Deal With Stress

Happy Thanksgiving (AND my take on gratitude!)

gratitude_1I wanted to wish you a hearty Thanksgiving and thank you for being a Client, Subscriber or friend. Your support means a lot to me (and hopefully you like what I share with you too).

Although it’s not something we celebrate much in the UK, I do remember many a Thanksgiving dinner when I was a boy growing up in Canada (where I was born and lived until the age of 10).

With all the nomadic traveling and Asian food I’ve become accustomed to in the last few years, I can tell you I ALWAYS appreciate my Mother’s slap up roast dinner with all the trimmings, when I return back home to the UK to visit that is.

But of course Thanksgiving is about more than awkward family moments and eating too much wonderful food! 🙂

It’s also about being grateful and thankful for our many blessings in life and I’m all in favor of gratitude as a daily practice.  I highly recommend you spend some time welcoming gratitude over the next few days and beyond that, every day.

But here’s something even more powerful you may not have considered about gratitude:

First, can you imagine embracing a whole new level of gratitude, at least as an experiment in this moment?

(And what if, in doing so, you unleashed something akin to a matter/anti-matter explosion of creative manifesting energy toward your goals and dreams?!)

OK, let me explain. Here’s one way we can look at gratitude and the creative cycle:

Desire -> Having -> Gratitude

1. We often start out in Desire — after all, you want to create, have, be, or do something new and special, yes?

And so the feeling of Desire continues — from just a few seconds to an entire lifetime (or lifetime*s* if you believe in that).

2. Then, at some point, you might GET the thing you wanted, and now there’s a feeling of HAVING (which is often fleeting). At this point, I invite you to look inside and discover for yourself — that the feeling of having does not come from the apparently external thing. The feeling of Having is self-generated. Good eh?

3. Then, out of the feeling of Having can come a feeling of Gratitude and thankfulness for what you have. This feels even better, doesn’t it? 🙂

But notice – when we’re desiring or wanting something, there’s suffering because we feel like we don’t have it. And many times, gratitude is offered as band aide relief from this agony of wanting. (Then you can get right back to the more important work of all-day-long wanting and suffering, right?!)

Counterpoint: Sometimes us “spiritual” folks are seen as poo-pooing desire and wanting — as if success is bad, as if getting what you want is bad, as if having dreams, intentions, and desires are bad. Maybe that’s why many of us feel guilty and ashamed of our desires and try to suppress them?

But does suppressing your desires actually work?

Nope! If we try to deny our desires (or anything else), then that’s just more suppression of the energy which keeps us contracted and further holds us back.

So yes, I’m all in favor of being grateful and thankful for what we have. But not when it is being done to try to suppress the agony of wanting, because that just makes things messier. So how about expanding our gratitude to include our desires and wanting too?

Can you imagine celebrating and being grateful for your DESIRES? Can you allow yourself to celebrate and be grateful for all your wanting, all your desire, all your dreams and aspirations too? How does that feel?

Check and see if that feels better than using gratitude to try to suppress wanting!

Take a minute or two and check.

Now how about one step further? Can you imagine actually FULFILLING your desires, and being grateful and thankful for THAT!

Now before you get too excited, I’m not suggesting we “go fulfil our desires in an explosion of hedonistic decadence,” and I’m also not asking you to ruminate on how great that would be (although that would be great, wouldn’t it?)

But what I am saying, is that it’s okay to have dreams and desires, and within a certain degree of moderation folks, you can 🙂

In other words, it’s okay to lift your lid (sometimes) and let off a little steam. It’s okay to have (and actually fulfill) your desires, dreams, goals, ambitions, obsessions, and intentions, even if it might not appear to be the purely “spiritual” thing to do. Will these external things make you happy? Probably not, but there’s nothing wrong with having them either.

So yes! Celebrate and be grateful for your having, but why not expand that to include all your desire and wanting too, and all the shades of grey in between. Be grateful for where you’re wanting and not having, and also allow yourself to have what you want (sometimes) and be grateful for that too!

Enjoy (but not too much!)

– Matt

P.S. I hope you enjoyed this post about extending your gratitude practice to include wanting and desire, and giving yourself permission to experiment with fulfilling desires. If you enjoyed it, you will love this even more:

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I was reading it today and was impressed. What I got from it was this: Why limit your manifesting power to how you feel when you can optimize your environment to create what you want more automatically and powerfully? I think each of the tweaks in this report could potentially double your manifesting power. Implement all 10 and who knows? 🙂

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Enjoy, and thank you for all your support!


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